Day 1: Live below the poverty line – £1 a day

• Breakfast: 30g of coco snaps + office milk
• Lunch: Tin of tomato soup + 1 pitta
• Dinner: 250g penne + half carton passata + two onions + four hotdogs + black pepper borrowed from housemate’s cupboard 

Tea and coffee is free at the office so I make the tactical decision to prepare breakfast at work. As I take photos of my cereal bowl from different angles, I attract weird looks from my colleague Mel in property innocently making a tea.

 I consider explaining myself but decide it would be funnier not to, so begin a paparazzi attack in the office kitchen- cue close ups of mugs and selfies with the microwave… If I don’t waste away by the end of the week I might get signed off work with a break down!

Verdict on the coco snaps – surprisingly good, impressed that they kept their structural integrity whilst saturated in milk. At around 11p a serving I am feeling fairly jubilant….

Lunchtime arrives, time for my soup. Wander to the kitchen and the smell of exotic foods hits my nostrils, I try to psyche myself up for the tedium of the soup.

Jake and Chris pull smug looks as they devour a Thai red curry and a chicken wrap, still at least I have the crumbs of moral high ground to savour… Hmmm…

Post-soup. One tin is actually quite a lot so I sit at my desk for remainder of afternoon suitably satiated….

Back at the ranch.

Dinner time ingredients.

Hot dogs were a lot stumper than I had imagined… Still it’s not the meat it’s what you do with it…

And just look at that! “She’s quite a slut in the kitchen!”, said none of my onlookers…

Ta da! It’s not dynamite but by no means horrible. I miscalculated the portion size and have made enough for two portions ( could’ve got the value chocolate after all!) at least that’s tomorrow’s dinner sorted, which is handy because I will need something I can grab quickly- I’ve been invited to the world darts competition a veritable pit of glutiny and temptation. 

Bring. it. on.